~ Alive ~

I just received a text message; as I picked up the phone and read the name of the sender a smile was drawn on my face. I found a sweet greeting from a friend wishing me an awesome day and telling me how much she loved me. Her text message made my day, it made feel blessed and grateful of having such awesome caring people near me. This young lady is one of the many people God used to bless me at the Destino Winter Conference.

We have all experienced that feeling we get when we are in a place and we know we are meant to be there, well, that was me at the Destino conference two weeks ago. While I was packing I kept wondering what was going to happen at San Antonio that long weekend. My head was full of questions and no answers would come up, what stirred my heart to curiosity the most was the fact that it was a last minute trip. Those who know me well have an idea of how much of a planner I am; I usually plan all my trips and the events I will attend, but this time God tossed my decision away and had decided to send me to Texas. It was God who changed my plans and turned my last weekend of the winter break into one the best and most memorable weekends I have had.

First of all, I had lost my job and had no way to afford my trip to Texas which is why I had decided not to attend; but the Faith of my dear friend Olivia kept encouraging me to at least try to attend. I followed her advice and gave it a try. Amazingly, in just two days the money was gathered the night before the carpool was leaving to Texas. I received donations from some kind hearts that heard about my story and my desire to attend the Destino Winter Conference. I was speechless and kept asking myself, how did this happen?! I must admit that my Faith levels were running kind of low that day because I still could not believe it. The conference had not even started and my life was already being blessed by the prayers and donations of my friends. And then by getting to know the students that rode in the van with me. I hardly knew a couple of people riding with us, but I sure can tell you that when the conference was over I felt like I knew them from years ago.

While at the conference I began to hear testimonies and stories that truly moved my heart. It was amazing listening how God has made a difference in the lives of so many young people that one day chose Jesus over their own lives. Their stories helped to encourage me, it reminded me of what God had done for my life and family, it brought back to my mind the idea of letting God do His great plans a reality in my life. At the same time it motivated me to keep going, to keep running the race, to keep serving God, to keep the fellowship and to keep an open heart for others. I had the privilege to share room with three amazing young ladies, -Bev, Alyssa & Marisol- they truly showed me how the love of God can unite unknown hearts and bond them with trust and sincerity through the love of Christ. Spending time with them was such a blessing, I learned so much from each one of them and I hope to carry that memory and blessing with me the rest of my life. During this weekend God taught me how necessary it is to be a little more open about myself and express my opinions with freedom. I was able to share my thoughts with my dear roommates, with a few new friends at the conference and I also shared my testimony with my van buddies. God taught me not to be afraid because is Him who gives the words to speak, is Him who prepares the hearts of the listeners and is Him who establishes the right time and place for these things to happen. Words by themselves are powerful, but when you allow God to speak through you it’s like when a mystery unfolds and the truth is finally revealed to you. God can speak through us in His own words, from His heart to ours, and the blessings of listening to His Words are much greater for the listener and the speaker.

Personally, the closing night of the conference was the most meaningful time of the weekend. I am sure that God listened to our hearts as we prayed for each other to close the conference. And even after, during women’s time, something else happened. God spoke to me and in a very personal way began to reveal things that had been holding me back from His Freedom. I took a small rock and wrote each one with a red maker, representing the blood of Christ over me, and then placed it at bottom of the cross. This was all part of the activity that Olivia had prepared for us during women’s time, but it came to hit me so personally that I could not hold my tears while God kept revealing to me one by one the things that are keeping us apart. Think about it, it is never cool to hear someone telling us what they think is wrong with us, but having God being the one telling you what’s your problem is not easy. My heart felt embarrassed, disappointed and sad to see how much I’ve failed the one who gave it all for me; but at the same time I knew that it was best for me to know it that way because He was offering His blood for me to receive forgiveness. He did, He forgave me. He washed my sin with His blood and renewed my heart that night and though I still struggle with my sinful nature and myself I am still running.

I remember that when we were starting the journey to San Antonio, Daniel asked everyone what were we expecting to get from the conference that weekend. My answer was, “I just want to acquire some knowledge, I want to come back home and bring something that will help me in my walk.” And indeed, it happened! God taught me about sharing with others and not keeping things to myself. He taught me that the Spirit could illuminate my mind to the things of His mind. He taught me that I must have a little more Faith and rely on His plans, not mine. He taught me that I must be a little more sensitive and aware of the well being of my brothers and sisters in Christ and of those who don’t know Him. He taught me that I could serve Him with every single aspect of my life, including my career. He taught me that there are many others like me, that seek Him and run along by my side and my job is to encourage them and help them out whenever is in my possibilities. He taught me that He provides the Freedom that all humans seek and that the Freedom has been acquired at the cross.